Advice I gave to a young man is paying off from a break up: “Lay it all out there with her. If you guys love each other – do what it takes. Ask her two questions. 1. Can we work on this together? 2. Would you like to be with me?”
She loves him. They are going to work it through. The power of a humble man beats pride any day. Truth wins.
Two days later, I received a text saying “thank you” from him. We chatted a bit more and I told him: “A humble man goes a long way. Just one thing, don’t let it get abused. You will know that line by your intuition. Women are visual as well. It’s the one misunderstanding I think men have. We need to see the actions of love. There ya go. For the rest of your life, you have the key.”
Not long after I messaged that, this came across my Twitter feed:
Don’t believe people who tell you they love you. Believe the people who show you.
I have dated some really prideful men when all I needed was to be shown vs words or hell, maybe even hearing would have been enough in one relationship. This isn’t about a man chasing a woman. This is about a man loving a woman and doing his part to keep things fresh, alive, grounded, stable and again: his part. What she does after that is her part. I don’t need to go deeper than this, I already advised for him to not let it get abused.
I don’t want to see this young couple fizzle into the trap of moving on and have the wash, rinse, repeat syndrome. There is no perfect partner – there is only a partner who is perfect for you.
Love isn’t a battlefield. It would be more of a bed of roses. They have thorns, beauty and all are uniquely different. It takes work to cultivate a good environment to get these beautiful creatures to grow. When two are side by side with equal care, they are amazing. Their roots will touch each other, drink the same water, share the same ‘bugs’ (aphid etc), require the same amount of light and shelter – but still remain the same unique rose as an individual.
Love from within your soul.